tame the animal inside
All the information needed to become healthier, smarter, and more attractive is easily accessible.
And yet, look around you.
The greatest adversary to achieving your dream life is yourself.
Your self-control.
We harness the latest advancements in operant conditioning and AI to help you achieve your goals.
Input your goals and receive discreet commands.
We utilize both positive and negative reinforcement.
Receive praise for good behavior.
“I am very proud of you...”
Get scolded for bad behavior.
“You’ve been a bad, bad boy…”
alongside a gentle electric shock
Earn or lose Good Boy points
Maintain your Obedience Streak
Science-backed, research-forward.
Human-grade electrical forceComplete AI integrationOnly unlocked via passkey
For professionals on-the-go.
The Sleek Anklet
+36% task completion
+78% staying within 150 feet of the office
The Graceful Cage
+327% task completion*
*excluding mortalities
“My life has changed forever since I installed the pavlov AI™ chip. According to last month’s pavlov AI™ report, my productivity has increased by 12% and I’ve never been happier, I have never felt more SYSTEM ERROR CODE 10034: REQUEST CANNOT BE COMPLETED”
- Client #00569, “Jeffrey”
My fiancé used to never clean up, wouldn’t listen, and I resented his devices for all the time he’d spend on them. Now, his devices and I have repaired our relationship, I input tasks on his pavlov AI™ that make him the most thoughtful, empathetic partner ever. We recently got engaged; I really don’t think our relationship could’ve survived without pavlov AI™.
- Client #a00039, "Claire"
“Shock collars have been extraordinarily effective in training my dog, and so I figured they would be equally helpful in helping me reach my goals. We are unfortunately animals at the end of the day: weak, unoptimized, and prey to the sins of the flesh.”
- Client #00409, “Melissa”
The data we’ve bought from pavlov AI™ has been unparalleled: we have complete visibility into users’ everyday lives and most intimate desires. It’s truly the greatest technological leap forward in ad targeting.
- Client #a00057, "Ryan"
"AGI is nearly upon us, and computers will soon far supersede human intelligence. The only way to escape the permanent underclass is to make us, as humans, more optimized than computers."
- Client #00397, "Anthony"
"After a lifetime of failed dieting, I finally have my dream body, without having to stoop so low as to pumping my body with Ozempic. pavlov AI™ provides a natural, scientific - even primal - alternative."
- Client #00324, "Priya"
“My life has changed forever since I installed the pavlov AI™ chip. According to last month’s pavlov AI™ report, my productivity has increased by 12% and I’ve never been happier, I have never felt more SYSTEM ERROR CODE 10034: REQUEST CANNOT BE COMPLETED”
- Client #00569, “Jeffrey”
My fiancé used to never clean up, wouldn’t listen, and I resented his devices for all the time he’d spend on them. Now, his devices and I have repaired our relationship, I input tasks on his pavlov AI™ that make him the most thoughtful, empathetic partner ever. We recently got engaged; I really don’t think our relationship could’ve survived without pavlov AI™.
- Client #a00039, "Claire"
“Shock collars have been extraordinarily effective in training my dog, and so I figured they would be equally helpful in helping me reach my goals. We are unfortunately animals at the end of the day: weak, unoptimized, and prey to the sins of the flesh.”
- Client #00409, “Melissa”
The data we’ve bought from pavlov AI™ has been unparalleled: we have complete visibility into users’ everyday lives and most intimate desires. It’s truly the greatest technological leap forward in ad targeting.
- Client #a00057, "Ryan"
"AGI is nearly upon us, and computers will soon far supersede human intelligence. The only way to escape the permanent underclass is to make us, as humans, more optimized than computers."
- Client #00397, "Anthony"
"After a lifetime of failed dieting, I finally have my dream body, without having to stoop so low as to pumping my body with Ozempic. pavlov AI™ provides a natural, scientific - even primal - alternative."
- Client #00324, "Priya"
Join 180,000 others on the waitlist.
Recommend to a friend who is discipline-deficient:
Not to worry, we require you to sign a waiver before purchase for our protection
Yes, we also offer custom programming for data collection for purchases exceeding 10 units
The Classic Collar starts at $315, The Sleek Anklet at $440, and The Graceful Cage at $750.We offer a lease-to-own agreement, in which we will “own” 5% of the user’s annual output in return for “leasing” their corporal productivity.Accompanying software is required and sold on a subscription basis, as outlined above, with the Basic “Pavlov Puppy” at $9.99/mo, the Standard “Iron Fist” at $29.99/mo, and the Premium “Total Domination” at $149.99/moWe offer custom pricing and programming for corporate buyers purchasing as an employee perk.Pricing for licensing user data varies, and is determined on an individual contract basis.
Yes, although pavlov AI™ technology is no longer recommended for individuals under the age of 12 or under 100lbs, pregnant women, or women with hysteria.
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